Barbara Jennnings

500-lbs woman kills world’s oldest tortoise by accidentally sitting on it

500-lbs woman kills world’s oldest tortoise by accidentally sitting on it

A woman was arrested this morning on the Atlantic island of Saint Helena for accidentally causing the death of the oldest known animal in the world, a 185-year old tortoise named Jonathan. The famous Seychelles giant tortoise lived on the grounds of Plantation House, the official residence of the island’s Governor, and belonged to the government of […]

 Barbara Jennnings

Doctor gets arm stuck for 8 hours in patient’s anus during prostate exam

Doctor gets arm stuck for 8 hours in patient’s anus during prostate exam

A Florida hospital is facing a multimillion-dollar lawsuit after one of his doctors negligently got his hand stuck in a patient’s rectal cavity for several hours after a prostate exam. 51-year old Ronald Walters presented himself last week at the Orlando Regional Medical Center for a routine exam designed to detect prostate cancer. Unfortunately, the […]

 Barbara Jennnings

Man who suffered heart attack after eating 21 burritos in a row sues Taco Bell for $4M

Man who suffered heart attack after eating 21 burritos in a row sues Taco Bell for $4M

A man from Pasadena has launched a multimillion-dollar lawsuit this morning against the American fast food chain Taco Bell, whom he blames for causing a heart attack that almost killed him. Eric James Johnson suffered a severe heart attack on February 16 while he was eating at a Taco Bell restaurant. The man crumbled on the […]

 Barbara Jennnings

Israel: Man claiming to be a time traveler turns himself in for the killing of Jesus Christ

Israel: Man claiming to be a time traveler turns himself in for the killing of Jesus Christ

A man turned himself in to the police in Jerusalem this morning, claiming he’s not only a time traveler but also the killer of Jesus Christ. The Jerusalem District Police has confirmed that an unidentified man dressed in a Roman armor presented himself this morning in its headquarters,  carrying a blood-covered spear-like weapon. The man, who speaks […]

 Barbara Jennnings

Man with Alzheimer’s disease dies after getting 14 flu shots in a day

Man with Alzheimer’s disease dies after getting 14 flu shots in a day

An 81-year old man suffering from Alzheimer’s disease was found dead in his home yesterday after getting more than a dozen influenza vaccines over an 8 hour period. Edward Norris, from Newark in New Jersey, was found dead in his bed yesterday morning by his visiting daughter. The elderly man was known to suffer from Alzheimer’s […]

 Barbara Jennnings

Man claims that drinking gallons of sperm cured him of homosexuality

Man claims that drinking gallons of sperm cured him of homosexuality

TUSCALOOSA, Alabama | A well-known naturopath and former LGBT militant claims to have “cured himself” of his homosexuality by drinking two glasses of sperm per day for a few months. 61-year old Brian Franklin was for several decades militant and leader of several organizations working for the promotion of LGBT rights. He says despite his […]

 Barbara Jennnings

5 jars of pickled human testicles found in auctioned storage unit

5 jars of pickled human testicles found in auctioned storage unit

A man made an eerie discovery after he purchased the content of a storage unit at an auction Yesterday, in Anaheim: five glass jars filled with dozens of marinated human testicles. 57-year Allen Price paid $375 at an auction for the content of a seized storage unit, hoping it could hold some hidden treasures. He did find […]

 Barbara Jennnings

Irish farmer claims he was sexually assaulted by a leprechaun

Irish farmer claims he was sexually assaulted by a leprechaun

A dairy farmer from Southern Ireland says he was sexually assaulted for two days by “an extremely short bearded humanoid” which he says is a leprechaun. In an exclusive interview broadcasted this morning on RTÉ, Angus Brennan from Watergrasshill, near Cork, says he was milking his cows on Saturday when he was hit on the head from behind with a shovel […]

 Barbara Jennnings

Philippines: Cruise ship vanishes after reporting sea monster attack

Philippines: Cruise ship vanishes after reporting sea monster attack

A cruise ship carrying 379 passengers and crew members is reported missing near the southern Philippine island of Mindanao after presumably being attacked by an unidentified sea creature. The Star of Manilla, an ocean liner belonging to Pacific Sunshine Cruises and carrying 255 passengers and 124 crew members, sent a distress signal and several radio messages […]

 Barbara Jennnings

Elderly woman accused of training her 65 cats to steal from neighbors

Elderly woman accused of training her 65 cats to steal from neighbors

Columbus, Ohio | An 83-year old woman was arrested this morning and accused of training dozens of cats to steal jewelry and other valuables from her neighbors. The Columbus Police Department opened an investigation on Ruth Gregson and her 65 cats in October after several neighbors reported small objects being stolen from their homes. Several victims […]

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