- It’s not a sign of a bad parent to get your twins confused, especially when they’re toddlers.
It’s not easy having an identical twin. If you have one, you’re probably used to strangers, teachers, and sometimes even friends confusing you for your sibling.
But at least you can always rely on your parents to know who is who.
Or not. An Argentinian woman recently had to seek officials’ help to figure out her babies’ identities.
Her identical twin toddlers simply look so similar that she can’t tell them apart.
Sofia Rodriguez, from Cordoba, used to use a colored ribbon to help distinguish her son Valentin from his brother, Lorenzo. But she removed the ribbon as it was getting too small.
Surely she would be able to identify her own children, she thought.
She was wrong. One day, as her sons were sick and she was changing their onesies, the realization sank in.
The 25-year-old mother had no idea which of the babies was which.
“It was crazy,” Rodriguez told Today. “I never thought I would get them confused.”
Yet, here we are.
Advice from Strangers
So, what was Rodriguez supposed to do? Neither she nor her boyfriend could tell the kids apart, so they felt they had no other option but to seek professional assistance.
They went to the police.
In a tweet, Rodriguez explained that she had to go to the police on March 2 to get her sons fingerprinted. She hoped they could compare them against Argentina’s National Registry of Persons (Renaper) records to determine which boy is which.
The police said they could. But it would take a couple of weeks.
Meanwhile, her story began to go viral on the internet. With that came people who started offering their tips and tricks on how Rodriguez could prevent the situation from happening again.
One netizen, with a twin brother of his own, said that his mother used to do what Rodriguez already tried — bracelets. He and his brother both wore a bracelet, one on the left wrist and the other on the right.
Another commenter suggested making an imprint of the bottoms of the children’s feet. Rodriguez could then compare the prints, like fingerprints, to try and distinguish the babies.
Rodriguez might’ve felt that she was an awful mother, but the comments revealed that she wasn’t alone in her struggle. One mother of twins noted that she bathed and medicated the same twin twice by accident. “But they survived,” she added.
And then one jokester recommended just giving the babies new names and starting over. Suppose that could work, too.
‘Not Such Bad Parents’
Finally, on March 15, officials from Renaper showed up. They took the kids’ fingerprints and started comparing them against their records.
Before that, though, Rodriguez and her boyfriend had decided to have a bit of fun with the situation. To test their parenting abilities, they’d made a game of the situation and tried guessing which son is which.
Finally, they had their results. But did they guess the babies’ identities correctly?
Yes, they did.
“At last, we’re not such bad parents,” Rodriguez tweeted in celebration.
She also received certificates of her sons’ identities. Now, all she has to do is not get them confused again.
How to Raise Your Twins
Funny as it seems, Rodriguez’s dilemma must’ve felt pretty nightmarish. But, according to Dr. Joan A. Friedman, her problem is far from unique.
Many parents struggle with telling identical twins apart, especially early in their lives, she said.
“[Rodriguez] must feel anxious, confused, overwhelmed and guilty … Identical twins look much alike, especially at birth,” explained Friedman.
“Excluding a difference in weight, birthmarks, or other obvious identifiers, it can be difficult to tell them apart.”
She recommends using the tricks we already mentioned — like bracelets, piercings, or toenails painted with non-toxic polish — to distinguish the children. Additionally, she said that parents should begin fostering the babies’ unique personalities as soon as possible in their lives.
“Some parents complain that teachers don’t know who is who, without a necklace or distinct haircuts. Parents should take some responsibility for this as their children go out in the world. Otherwise, it can take a psychological toll,” said Friedman.
According to Friedman, it’s best if parents try to avoid the “best friend” scenario, where they and others treat the twins as one unit. Instead, they should encourage their individual tastes and interests, even if the kids protest at first.
However, that is not necessarily because the twins don’t like being separated. They’re simply not used to having one-on-one time with their parents, because they’ve always cared for the babies together.
Fortunately, Friedman adds that life gets a lot easier once the kids grow and develop their own personalities. But until then, it’s best to keep the ribbons on their wrists.
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