‘I want to be my dad’s best man when he marries his ex mistress – but mum will hate me’

A man who said yes to being his dad’s best man at his wedding to his former mistress has caused mix opinions online, because his mum is so hurt she has said she’ll never speak to him again

A man who has agreed to be his dad’s best man when he gets married to his former mistress has received mixed reactions online for telling his story. The situation has caused a deep rift in his family, because his mum is incredibly hurt that the 27-year-old accepted, knowing that the dad had an affair with her while they were together.

The man explained the situation on Reddit’s Am I the A**hole forum, saying his parents’ marriage had been a “mess” and they “argued every day”. When the son was 17, his dad had tried to divorce the mum – but she tried everything to make him stay.

He explained: “My father asked for divorce and my mother begged him to stay with her.

“She tried everything: begging, threats, blackmail… She even tried convincing him that she was pregnant. The neighbours ended up calling he police because of my mum’s loud cries.”

The situation was diffused and the dad agreed to stay, but four months later the mum found our he was having an affair with a woman, who the son gives the fake name Anna.

He continued: “My father confessed, told mom [sic] he had been seeing Anna for the last couple of months. He asked my mother for a divorce and, this time, she agreed.”

The son “distanced himself” from the situation, but he loved Anna, and she was nothing but respectful to him.

The forum post continued: “In the New Year’s Eve, my father finally proposed to Anna. They asked me to be the best man, I accepted right away.

“My sister later asked me if I was sure I wanted to do that, because of how my mum would feel. I said I completely understand that my mom [sic] will always be resentful of my dad and Anna, but I love them and I want to be part of their wedding.

“My sister sighed and dropped the subject. I thought it was the end of it, but I was wrong.”

The man said that ever since then, the mum has been “constantly calling and texting” telling him to say no.

He added: “She says she will never talk to me again if I don’t. My mum says I’m horrible for making her relive the trauma of losing another loved one to Anna.”

The son said he felt “really bad”, but also didn’t want to “give in”.

The post proved controversial online, with some people criticising that he had “picked sides”.

One person said: “You did end up picking sides. No matter how their relationship was, you make it sound like your mother deserved to be cheated on.”

Another said: “Your dad cheated on your mum with Anna and you are celebrating that fact. Do you have no love for your mother. I hope your mother stops speaking to you as you clearly don’t care about her. Poor mum.”

However, others sympathised with the son, with one person saying: “Your mum’s relationship with your dad is not your concern. It’s been 10 years. You’re being more mature than your mom [sic] and she can make this choice to ruin your relationship with her, if she wants.”

Another added: “Your parent’s relationship is their business between them. Be in the weeding and support your father if you want to.

“Your mum’s feelings are her own business, and if she really won’t speak to you because of this, she’s the a**hole here.”

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