Mum fumes as childminder calls her son a ‘monster’ – but some criticise her parenting

A mum of a toddler has been left fuming after her childminder called her son a ‘monster’, and she now wants to pull him out of the nursery and find a new one

Parenthood is tough, make no mistakes about it. Each stage of a child’s journey brings a whole new set of challenges. Just when you think you’ve got it sussed, you’re faced with a new situation.

Toddlerhood can be a particularly tricky stage for parents. They don’t call it the ‘terrible twos’ for nothing. At this stage, little ones are exploring the world. It’s a wonderful part of their development, but can be infuriating and exhausting for mums and dads too.

One anonymous mum has taken to the Mumsnet forum for some support and guidance after her son’s childminder called him ‘a little monster’.

She is fuming but also beset with worry, and also at a loss to know how to handle the situation. He’s a gorgeous boy, she says, but, like many toddlers, can be a handful at times.

“My two year old son goes to a childminder,” she explained. “He’s a sweet boy, but he has been misbehaving lately. Basically, he pulls other children’s hair when he wants a toy.

They have tried to manage his behaviour. But, as any parent of a two-year-old will attest, the best laid plans do not always work out: “Whenever he does that to his little sister (eight months) we tell him off sternly. A lot of the times we prevent it from happening because we see he’s about to do it and we pull him away.”

“I know it is totally unacceptable and I fully support the childminder disciplining him (within reason),” she is at pains to point out. But the chosen words of her childminder have shocked her.

“I’m just so upset at the language they used at pickup. They said, ‘He’s been an absolute monster today. We can’t go on like this. A little girl screamed when she walked in and saw him. We can’t have children coming in being scared. Something has to give. We have to start being much more stern with him’.”

It can be wounding to hear one’s children criticised and she is struggling with it: “I’m quite upset. I know my son isn’t a saint, but he’s also not a monster. I also don’t understand why they are confronting me as if I can do anything about it. When he’s at the childminder I am working, that’s why I use childcare. I have no influence on what he is doing there.”

Her post on Mumsnet attracted several hundred comments, all with a point to put across. Many sympathised with her, but others criticised her parenting.

One said: “I would have no concern over that. She doesn’t mean it like an actual monster like he’s done something horrific. She probably means he’s been naughty / difficult. I would be more concerned my child was scaring others to that degree.”

Another offered their straight forward view on the matter: “Saying he’s been a monster sounds about right though.”

Others advised a different perspective: “It’s an awful word but I do think there is a big difference between saying he is an absolute monster and saying he’s been an absolute monster today.”