‘My best friend says I gave my sons ‘naughty boy’ names – now I feel guilty’

A mum has begun to feel ‘guilty’ over the names she chose for her two sons after her best friend told her they had ‘negative’ associations and were ‘naughty boy names’

You have the freedom to choose whatever name you see fit for your child, but while the subject is no one else’s business, some people are likely to judge others for their decisions. That’s what happened to one mum who posted online after she was made to feel “guilty” for the names she chose for her two sons, because her friend thinks they are “naughty boy” names that will lump her kids with a stigma when they hit school age.

The mum claimed she named her sons Arran and Lewis after two of the Scottish Isles, and although she loved the names at first, she’s now started to regret her decision, as she doesn’t want her boys to be stereotyped as “naughty”. She said her friend called her “really brave” to have chosen the names she did, and she’s now unsure if there’s merit to what her mate has been saying.

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In a post on Mumsnet, she said: “A friend made a light-hearted comment (supposedly) about my two children’s names last week and I am convinced she’s a Mumsnet member, seeing as she used the term ‘naughty boy name’.

“My husband has got Scottish roots and before we tried to conceive, the plan was always that we would honour his history. He used to live in Scotland but moved to England to settle down with me and as all his family are still in Scotland, we felt Scottish names would be a nod to them.

“We had a son first and called him Arran (pronounced Arun) after one of the Isles and we joked that if our second child was a girl, we would call her Skye. Our second child turned out to be another gorgeous boy so we called him Lewis, after one of the other Scottish Isles.

“My friend is pregnant – which is why we were talking about names – and she said (with a giggle) that it was really brave of me to give both my sons names that are associated with being naughty. She laughed it off but it really hurt.

“I’ve since come on here as we have been thinking about trying to conceive baby number three, and I have seen Lewis be labelled as a ‘naughty boy’ name. I know a child’s name doesn’t define them, but I feel so guilty that I may have given both my boys a name that has negative associations.

“Has anyone else been in a similar boat and how did you move on from it?”

Many commenters were quick to reassure the mum that she had picked “lovely” names for her sons, and that there was no such thing as a “naughty name”.

One person said: “There is no such thing as a ‘naughty boy name’. It is just the personal associations people have with a name.”

While another added: “This is nuts and not something I’ve heard before, on here or elsewhere. They’re lovely names and your friend was being bitchy.”

And a third said: “Just ignore what she said. It was incredibly insensitive to say such a thing to you. Mind you, my friend gets told that regularly about her son’s name – he’s called Jack. It seems to be something people feel free to say to the mothers!”

One commenter, however, admitted that they did have a list of names they would consider to be “naughty”, but said that Arran and Lewis don’t feature on that list.

They posted: “Never really thought about ‘naughty names’ but when I read the title though I immediately had a few names in my head that I thought you might say. Arran and Lewis I definitely wouldn’t consider naughty names! Both are quite lovely. Ignore your friend, quite a mean comment to have made.”

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