‘My daughter keeps wasting electricity – I’m tempted to kick her out my house’

A woman has taken to Reddit to seek advice after planning to kick her daughter out of her house because she kept leaving lights and appliances switched on

Nobody said parenting is easy – but it is extremely rewarding when done right. But one mum has revealed how she intends to kick her 16-year-old daughter out of her house because she has been wasting electricity.

Taking to Reddit, the woman explained how she fell pregnant when she was 21-years-old and heavily relied on her parents to help bring up her daughter as she was still in college. She said: “They took on the roles of her parents and her father has never been in the picture so I was grateful. Although she knows I’m her mother, she sees me as a sister.

“I try my best to make sure she lives comfortably and has everything she needs but really, there’s only so much I can do since my parents are capable enough and I appreciate them.”

But now she is in a more stable position as a 36-year-old, the woman is attempting to form a mother-daughter bond by having her stay over at her house on a more regular basis.

“I’ll be honest, I’ve always wanted this but she didn’t, she only came because my parents asked her to. The plan was to stay for two months,” she added.

However, two weeks’ in and the woman is already fed up with her daughter living in her house as she constantly leaves the lights and other appliances switched on, wasting electricity and creating fire hazards.

She said: “She’s a darling for the most part but she leaves every appliance she uses on.

“If she enters a room and turns on the lights, she will leave it on too. It’s quite irritating and I tried to talk to her about it.

“She laughed it off every time and told stories about her bad memory and what she forgot to turn off at so and so’s house.

“Part of me thinks she’s doing it to vex me.

“I honestly have no problem turning lights off when she leaves rooms but my house is never lacking in kids.

“I have none myself apart from my daughter but my friends and neighbours often drop theirs over for me to watch them and I love them.

“Yesterday, my daughter went out with friends and left the electric iron on and I only found out when my neighbour’s kid told me the iron is hot.

“Needless to say, I was furious.

“I went off on my daughter when she came back and reminded her that kids like to poke at sockets and the iron could have caused an injury. Besides, it’s a fire hazard.

“She said ok, sorry, and she would try to remember, only to leave it on again this morning.”

Fed up with her disregard for the issues she is creating, the woman spoke with her daughter about it and decided it would be best if she moved back in with her grandparents.

“I spoke to my daughter a while ago and told her my side of things – how I genuinely feel about her and all this and she listened,” she added.

“She didn’t say much but she admitted she doesn’t really see me as a mother since she knew me as a distant sister first so she didn’t know what to do when her grandparents asked her to come over.

“She’s not ready to call me mum yet. She doesn’t think she ever will and she assumed I would expect her to.

“She’s also upset about me having kids over most of the time as she feels they shouldn’t get the right to be so close and clingy to me when she doesn’t have that kind of freedom because again, I’m more of a sister she sees once in a lifetime to her.

“I realised it’s going to be much harder than I ever imagined but I will try my best going forth to make her feel loved and welcome.

“I understand I should keep my boundaries but (in her words) I should stop walking on eggshells around her too, which I will try to.

“She didn’t promise to do the same but she did promise to stop doing things that could potentially cause harm, which is a huge step.”

While most users praised the woman for speaking openly with her daughter, others urged her to keep working on their relationship because “it’s not going to blossom overnight”.

One user said: “Sit down and talk with her. She’s acting out and if she says she doesn’t want to be there, listen. Tell her you love her and that you’ll be there for her when and if she’s ready.”

Another user added: “My advice would be try to be honest, open and tactful. Don’t push it, baby steps.

“You do this first, before her, then she’ll more likely do the same.

“Don’t push to do something she likes just because she likes it, try to find things you both like and enjoy and ask if she’d want to do those together.

“Don’t get angry if she doesn’t want to, maybe she is not feeling comfortable at the moment.”

A third user said: “I feel you both need counselling – she may be struggling with ‘abandonment’ or identity issues.”