Woman slates ‘vanilla’ sex positions guide with illustrations she got after hip surgery

A woman has shared the unassuming leaflet she received titled ‘sexual relations’ which includes small illustrations of four sex positions with short instructions on how to achieve each one

It might not be the first thing on your mind after major surgery, but navigating sex while recovering from an operation is certainly something that needs considering. One ‘bionic’ woman has shared her disappointment at a sex position guide she received from the hospital after a hip replacement.

Taking to TikTok to describe her new-found predicament, geography researcher Carla Barrett shared a screenshot of the unassuming leaflet she received following her hip dysplasia diagnosis. Titled “sexual relations”, the medical guide includes small illustrations of four sex positions with short instructions on how to achieve each one.

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The blurb above the illustrations warns patients to “think carefully about the position of your new hip” during intercourse.

In a glorious takedown of the hospital’s advice, Carla declared her disappointment at the leaflet, slating its lack of creativity and questioning how it suits her demographic.

She said: “When I went in for my hip replacement, this is the guidance of the hospital, gave me on how to have sex after becoming bionic.

“Hats off to them for providing this, especially as the main demographic of this leaflet is probably patients in their seventies and eighties. Although it does raise a couple of questions.”

Slamming the leaflet’s small pictures, Carla probed: “If you’re concerned about whose legs are going where, you probably want to be able to decipher who’s limb is who’s within these pictures.”

Feeling less than inspired by sex guide, the London-based researcher added: “My second question is could we come up with some more creative positions? Just an idea.”

Carla revealed yet another issue with the leaflet in the comments on her video, where she pointed out that the advice wasn’t very helpful for her as she isn’t in a heterosexual relationship.

TikTok users were left in stitches at Carla’s comedic response to the medical guidance, with one person even relating to her post-op woes. They said: “I had the same when I had my back op, although there were *slightly* more exciting positions too”.

Another commenter jokingly questioned their abilities in the bedroom even without a hip replacement, saying: “Okay, but one of those I cannot do even with my nonbionic limbs and 20 yo body… soo”

Many people questioned the legitimacy of the advice, pointing out that the recovery time for a hip replacement is far shorter than it used to be thanks to improved procedures.

One said: “I’m 28 and have both hips replaced. I was told these are old rules that doesn’t need to be followed now. I can do the splits and bend in all sorts.”

In another brilliant comment, one TikTok user revealed just how useful this guidance can be for elderly patients. They shared: “Orthopaedic sister here, you’d be surprised just how many 70 & 80 year olds ask for this info”.

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