‘I want my fiancé to get his tattoo removed – it’s his ex-wife’s name’

We probably all know someone who has a tattoo they regret and it might be something they can look back and laugh about – but if it’s an exes name, it’s probably a whole different story

If somebody you were romantically involved with had their ex-wife’s name tattooed on them, it’d probably make you feel a little bit uncomfortable. Plus, if the tattoo also had the names of their ex-wife’s kids too, it would make it a thousand times worse. That’s why one woman was insistent that her fiancé get his tattoo covered up or removed.

She took to Mumsnet to ask whether people thought she was being unreasonable to make the request, or whether it was something she was well within her rights to want. She explained that the tattoo was his wedding present to his ex, but they were divorced five years later. Eight years on from the split, he still has the tattoo.

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She wrote: “Am I being unreasonable to ask my fiancé to get a tattoo removed or covered up? The tattoo is his ex-wife and her kids’ names.

“When my fiancé was 19, he married a 30-year-old woman who had two kids of her own. As a wedding present to her, he got her and the kids’ names tattooed on his back. Five years later they divorced as he wanted kids in the future and she didn’t want anymore.

“My fiancé hasn’t seen or spoken to them since the divorce eight years ago. Last we heard, they had moved abroad. He said he was young and stupid and regrets wasting those years. I’m not jealous or anything, I know he had a life before I came along!

“I’ve mentioned the tattoo a couple of times before – he said he’s had it so long, he forgets it’s there and it doesn’t bother him because he can’t see it anyway!

“It was a little awkward explaining to my family on holiday last year. I’ve asked him if he ever thought about getting it removed or covered up and he said he would rather spend the money on us, the wedding or a nice holiday. I think he may be scared of the pain. He hasn’t said this but he is not very good when it comes to pain!

“I’m sure if I told him how much it’s bothering me then he would do something about it. I just wanted to check if I was being unreasonable as it is his body so his choice at the end of the day. What do you think?”

The post sparked a fierce debate between those who thought the woman was being controlling, and others who thought she was well within her rights to ask.

One wrote: “It’s not controlling at all to ask if he would mind covering it or whatever it is you do with tattoos. You can ask him, but if he doesn’t want to, that’s his prerogative. It’s not controlling to ask though!”

Another said it was completely his choice, writing: “It’s up to him, yeah I wouldn’t like it either but you’ve tried to speak to him about it and he clearly isn’t that bothered.

“Also tattoos are expensive, especially a cover up as generally it’s better to go much larger and have the focal point not on the covered up area – so if he’s not flush with money, I can understand stalling it.”

Others defended the woman, commenting: “Obviously you know he was married, but you shouldn’t have to look at the name of another woman on his skin. He might not have to see it, but you can. I would hate that!”

One mum wrote: “Would anyone on here really want to see their partner have an ex’s name tattooed on their back. No, they wouldn’t. It’s not about jealousy but once they break up it’s stupid to keep it.”

Would you want your partner to get a tattoo removed if it said the name of their ex? Let us know in the comments.