‘I’m a psychic medium and the spirits help me tackle my fear of hair cuts’

Anxiety and fears come in all forms but some are rarer than others. Tracy May, a dermatology assistant, suffers from tonsurephobia – the uncommon fear of getting your hair cut, from the Greek word ‘Tonsure’ meaning ‘ to cut’.

She says it is “nothing to be laughed about” and wishes people would stop treating it as a “joke”, as the 51-year-old has suffered from the crippling fear since she was 25 and has been unable to find an effective treatment – until now.

Tracy is a psychic medium, and she said that by channelling spirits on the other side she is able to stay calm – as they give her positive messages and distract her from her phobia.

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Tracy had home haircuts by her hairdresser father or family friends until the age of 25, making her first time in a salon “traumatic”. She said: “I remember just closing my eyes and feeling really emotional and thinking, why am I here?

“Wherever I looked, there was people, you know, there was too much going on, and I think it was a bit of anxiety, probably a panic attack, and (thinking) why am I here?

“But I was already stuck. That’s another thing, I was stuck in the chair. Once they start, you can’t move. It’s like going to the dentist, once they start, you can’t go anywhere.

“She did a really good job, but I do remember just feeling quite overwhelmed and I remember I didn’t even want to look at (my hair). I just had to get out.”

While Tracy is unable to pinpoint the exact source of her fear, she does remember watching Edward Scissorhands in 1993 and believes this intensified her underlying fears. The film, which was directed by Tim Burton and featured Johnny Depp as Edward, was released in 1990, and Tracy described seeing clips of Edward cutting hair as “a nightmare”.

“My worst nightmare is Edward Scissorhands,” the mum of three said. “I cannot watch that.

“I remember seeing clips of it and thinking, ‘Oh my God, why would you do that? Why would you do that to somebody?’ I think maybe that’s come into it.”

When facing her fears, Tracy is not alone as she claims to be able to communicate with spirits as a psychic medium. She first realised she had a talent for the supernatural when she was seven years old.

As a child, she remembers having an imaginary friend who she would talk to regularly. The Faversham resident, who grew up in London, said she also recalls being visited by a nun at that time, and she would “hide (visiting spirits) in cupboards and under the bed”.

Spirits have continued to communicate with Tracy throughout her life, and she said they have even contacted her before and during her haircuts to try to give her support.

“(Before the haircut), I am literally shaking,” Tracy explained. “I pray, I meditate, I do everything in the car, and I talk to spirits, saying, ‘please help me’.

“The spirit just comes back and goes, ‘it’s not your hair’, or ‘got to trust’, or ‘it’s going to be OK, have faith,’ but I just can’t. It’s just scary.”

Luckily, Tracy has found a hairdresser she feels comfortable with and recognises her fears. This doesn’t make the process easier though and she has not yet found a cure. The 51-year-old said she has tried putting crystals in her bra, using essential oils and doing breathing exercises to calm herself down, but nothing has completely treated her phobia.

She said: “There’s so much going on – perming, curling – and, you know, you get quite anxious.

“I think, with haircuts, it’s the whole environment as well. It’s not just the actual (haircut).”

Tracy’s husband, Ken, 52, who works as a railway assistance manager, always accompanies Tracy when she gets her hair cut, so she will often talk to him to distract herself. Other people getting their hair cut is also a trigger for the mum of three who cannot watch her sons David, 26, and James, 23, or her daughter, Abigail, 17, in the salon.

She believes hair is linked to identity and does not understand why someone would want to change that. The mum explained: “Your hair is part of you, it’s a part of your identity.

“If you change your hair, you’re a different person. If I die my hair green, you’ll think I’m freaky. Why would you change your identity? Why would you do that to yourself?

“The transformation looks amazing, (but) it’s the bit in between, and also, when you cut it, you can’t put it back.”

Tracy said her family is really supportive, but others don’t believe her phobia is real. There have been instances where people find it “funny” or think it is a “joke”, adding: “Nobody takes me seriously”.

While she recognises that her phobia is more unusual than others, such as fearing spiders or snakes, she wishes people would be “more empathetic” and understanding.

“It’s not funny. I probably sound really stupid, but I’m really quite passionate when I talk about it,” Tracy said.

“It is real, and because nobody I know has it, it makes me think, well, why have I got it?”

She continued: “It would be really good for hairdressers to realise that there are people with phobias, with anxiety, and to be aware.

“It would be really good if they could advertise that because there must be loads of people who have probably got bad hair issues that need somebody who is understanding.

“I really want people to be aware that there are people like me.”

To find out more about Tracy’s work and her psychic readings, visit her Facebook page.

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