‘My mum-in-law demands to be present at my baby’s birth – it’s disrespectful’

After a tricky 21-hour birth the first time round after a misplaced epidural, the woman just wants this time to be her and her husband but is struggling to keep it that way

A pregnant mum is struggling to say no to her mother-in-law who wants to be in the room when she gives birth to her second child. The woman took to Reddit to explain that she had a difficult birth the first time round after the epidural was misplaced so she wants to keep this birth more simple with just her and her husband – but she doesn’t want to offend her relative.

In the post, the woman, who remained anonymous, explained: “Tonight my mother- in- law dropped the ball that she is angry that I chose for my mum to be in the delivery room when our daughter was born.

“It wasn’t planned, but I was in such an amount of pain that I wanted her and baby’s dad in the end. I had no idea she was upset until tonight.”

The woman went onto say that the mother-in-law is now pushing to be in the delivery room and is even telling the woman not to take drugs like the epidural.

She said: “My epidural failed the first time and unfortunately I had to do it all natural.

“I am certainly getting a — correctly placed— epidural this time. Despite her saying that it ‘slows down the labor [sic]’ I was in labor [sic] for 21 hours but that was not the drugs.

“I am not confrontational. I don’t know how to just say no. This is our last baby and I just wanted it to be us (my husband and I) for that special experience.”

The soon-to-be mum is not sure what to do now as she is sure the mother-in-law will be upset but she doesn’t want her there.

“I’m only 10 weeks along and already this is stressing me out. And it’s not even to support me! She wants to tame her own curiosity of actually watching a baby be born,” she explained.

In response, many have been quick to support the author of the post as one person wrote: “Your feelings are the most important thing. Your feelings are the only ones that matter because you are the mother. It’s your day, your body that will be in a vulnerable state.”

While another said: “It’s a ridiculous thing for her to expect. No one gets to demand to be there- you get to ask them.”

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