- Here are a few choice words for when you need to bite your thumb at a lily-livered ragged wart.
Ah, William Shakespeare! The Bard is one of, if not the most influential writer in the English language.
Today, 400 years after his death, we still quote his works and for a good reason. But not all the language in his writings has survived the passing of time — namely the insults.
Shakespeare’s characters often use colorful phrases to express their distaste for each other, but not every insult makes sense today. Some of the slurs have lost their meaning as language and culture has changed.
That doesn’t make them any less brilliant, though. Here are seven insults from Shakespeare’s works that still sting today — once you figure out what an earth they mean.
1) “You egg.”
Full Quote: “What, you egg?”
Source: Macbeth (Act 4, Scene 2)
Let’s start with a tamer one, at least verbally. In Macbeth, an assassin speaks this line to a defiant child, Lady Macduff’s son, before brutally murdering him.
The insult pales in comparison to the following act, but what does it mean? As it usually is with Shakespeare, there’s a double meaning here.
First of all, the insult is aimed at a child. The assassin about to kill the boy compares him to an unhatched egg — a completely helpless baby bird facing a predator.
But there’s also the fact that eggs are pretty dull, featureless things. To add insult to injury, the assassin calls the kid’s attempts to resist him as boring as looking at an egg.
2) “By the Book”
Full Quote: “You kiss by the book.”
Source: Romeo and Juliet, 1.5.109
Romeo and Juliet is often considered the greatest love story of all time — for some reason. Seriously, the couple commits suicide by the end. That’s not a good relationship goal, people.
Also, Juliet doesn’t apparently put much stock in Romeo’s romantic abilities, at least if his kisses are anything to go by. As with the egg insult, there are a couple of things at play here.
The first meaning is the one you’re familiar with. Romeo’s kisses are done by the book — that is, they lack passion and he seems to be just going through the motions.
But at the same time, Juliet could be saying that it’s as if Romeo’s studied the art of kissing, as if from a book. Maybe Juliet’s not the first one he’s smooched?
Honestly, knowing Shakespeare, it’s probably both.
3) “Whoreson Zed”
Full Quote: “Thou whoreson Zed, thou unnecessary letter!”
Source: King Lear, 2.2.65
Okay, this one needs a bit more explanation. The Latin alphabet hasn’t remained the same through the years, and letters have been dropped and added.
“Z” is one of those letters. It disappeared from the Latin alphabet in the 4th century but it had returned by Shakespeare’s time.
But the letter was still practically never used, even though it was in the alphabet. So, this insult calls somebody completely useless.
We all probably know at least one whoreson Zed. They’re there, but they’re just a waste of space.
4) “Crusty Batch of Nature”
Full Quote: “How now, thou crusty batch of nature! What’s the news?”
Source: Troilus and Cressida (Act 5, Scene 1)
This insult sounds strange at first, but it’s really not that complex. Just use your imagination for a bit.
Picture a “crusty batch of nature.” What might you find in such a spot?
Perhaps something dried to a crisp, perhaps overgrown with mold. In general, it’s not a pleasant discovery.
And that’s what you’re calling somebody.
5) “Ass in Compound with Your Syllables”
Full Quote: “I can’t say your worships have delivered the matter well, when I find the ass in compound with the major part of your syllables.”
Source: Coriolanus, 2.1.58-60
If there’s an insult in Shakespeare that’s completely lost its meaning, it’s this one. To understand the insult, you first need to know the speaker is a Roman character — so he’d know Latin.
Anyone well-read in Shakespeare’s days would’ve also studied Latin. And in Latin, there’s a suffix -as that you tack onto words in certain grammatical structures.
So, the -as is in compound with the syllables of the word. It also sounds like “ass” — you know, like a donkey or a fool.
Basically, this is an extremely verbose way to say whoever’s speaking is a moron and every word out of their mouth is total bulls***.
6) “I’ll Tickle Your Catastrophe”
Full Quote: “You scullion! You rampallian! You fustilarian! I’ll tickle your catastrophe!”
Source: Henry IV, Part 2, 2.1.60
Henry IV probably has the most insults out of any Shakespeare play. Just this one line has four of them, but let’s focus on the last one — tickling someone’s catastrophe.
You know that “catastrophe” means the same as “disaster.” But in the 16th century, it had a different meaning.
“Catastrophe” was a term used in theater as a synonym for the finale or end point of a drama that was often somehow disastrous for the characters.
So, Shakespeare is saying he’ll tickle your scandalous end point… Yes, he’s threatening to kick your ass.
7) “I Have Done Thy Mother”
Full Quote: “Villain, I have done thy mother!”
Source: Titus Andronicus (Act 4, Scene 2)
When you think of Shakespeare, you’re probably imagining sophisticated works of high literature. And that’s what they are, for the most part.
Perhaps you’re expecting to find one of Shakespeare’s famous puns or double entendres here. Surely there has to be a deeper meaning to this insult.
Nope. The Bard wasn’t above having one of his characters reply to an enemy with, “Yeah? Well, I banged your mom.”
Finer words were never written.
Hits: 0
